Tuesday, October 6, 2015

When it rains...

The transition between late September and early October was a rough one. Many shitty things happened at once, though in the grand scheme of things none were catastrophic and I feel like maybe I don't even get to complain because so many people are dealing with worse, but the fact remains that it was a really shitty 3 weeks. While C was hunting, our beagle got sick. It seemed that he aspirated something, but his breathing didn't improve over the next two weeks. The week C was hunting, I ran out of my meds because I just didn't have time to go to the pharmacy, and when I did go the doctor (for some unknown reason) didn't refill my meds for a year, but only for two months. So they gave me 3 days worth but it was a full week before I got back to the pharmacy. My OCD/anxiety were ramping up.

While my brain was in this state, I got totally slammed with sample processing my first 3 days back at work after the week off while C was hunting. As in 3 9 hour days with only 1 break to pump if any, and like 5 minutes for lunch. One of those days I had 3 blood samples to process- when I've asked in the past that no more than 1 blood happen at a time, maximum two per day, and I got 3 AT ONCE. And in the midst of this, I was informed that I was going to be consolidating my lab space in to *half* of what I've had for the last 8 years (which is ongoing, and the people moving in are apparently not getting what they asked for either and keep asking me for more space which I don't have to give). I was feeling really undervalued as an employee. During this time my dog was not really getting better, but he seemed okay. Stable.

My mom wonderfully was able to watch the kids while I was working late and C had to leave for work before I could get home. On Thursday of the week I was finally able to get my meds. Friday morning, on my way to work, I heard a (seemingly) harmless little "click" and the engine stopped. Of course. It was the timing belt. C came, we towed the Subaru home, and it sat there in the driveway til Tuesday when we got it towed to a mechanic. Fortunately I was able to get a ride with someone else on my floor at work who lives near me for the week we were down to one car, and my mom helped with the kids again. The mechanic informed us that we needed a new engine, the brakes needed maintenance, the power steering boot on the driver's side was torn, and oh, by the way, the clutch needed to be replaced too. The cost of all this? Well, we couldn't get a used car that would last 150K miles for this price, but damn. Not money we really had, but we did get the car back on Friday which was great.

Thursday night we noticed MacGyver was really struggling. He was lethargic and did not finish his food. I called the emergency vet (because, naturally, the regular vet had closed 10 minutes earlier). This earned him an overnight stay, medicine, and some Xrays. We learned that our 11 (almost 12) year old beagle has congestive heart failure, pneumonia, and possibly a mass on his liver (we didn't have $700 more to spend on the ultrasounds to confirm the mass and get a better look at his heart). He did get to come home on Friday evening, and we were all so glad to have him home. He's now getting better every day (and getting back to being a pain in the ass, which is wonderful).

And now? Now I'm rebounding, but my soul is exhausted and wrung out. My mental state is muted. It's better this week but I'm still reeling from the ups and downs (mostly downs) of the last few weeks. I just need a break, but I'm treading water to stay afloat at work and there's no end in sight. I just hope the Universe is done fucking with me for a while.

Oh, and another fun note about something that *just* happened: one of the people at work informed me today that she took my desk phone into the cell culture room for my ENTIRE MATERNITY LEAVE. I realize that I've been back for 6 months, and cleaning/sterilizing my phone now is an empty gesture, but what in the ever-loving-fuck. Join me, won't you, in a massive full body shudder? And then this same person just left candy on the chemical bench. Which I've since thrown away, because there are just places that food NEVER goes.

On the upside, my garden (mostly tomatoes) went gangbusters this year.

Praying mantis! From my Mother's Day eggs, perhaps?

Tiny watermelon! We had to pick it early because a rabbit bit the stem through...

Most recent harvest

Edit: Oh, Universe. I see what you did there. PMS on top of everything? Lovely. And now, ladies and gentlemen, my first postpartum period.

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