Grateful

I am so grateful that I have a healthy family. My son is growing and normal and healthy. My husband is supportive and handsome and talented, and also healthy. Our dogs are crazy, but neither seems ready to depart this world quite yet. My pregnancy was awful, but it was successful. I had morning sickness for 15ish weeks, but I didn't have hyperemesis. I had gestational diabetes but didn't have to take insulin. I had preterm labor but didn't have to be on bedrest. I was in early labor (contractions every 5-10 minutes constantly) for 2 weeks before my son was born, and I had an episode of bleeding that I am fairly certain was the result of a partial placental abruption, but my baby didn't die. I had 2 failed epidurals when the time finally came, and pushed for 2 1/2 hours, but didn't have to have a C-section. I lost about 1.5 liters of blood (roughly 1/4 of my blood) during labor and delivery (also supporting my theory of abruption), but I didn't need a transfusion or a hysterectomy, and I didn't die. My son didn't die.

I have not lost a baby, and I desperately hope I never do. My sister has lost a baby, and my sister-in-law has lost more than one. I hope that neither loses another, and I wish there was a way to ensure that no-one would ever experience the pain of loss.

I am grateful, Universe, for what I have, and what I have not, experienced. I am grateful for my life and the lives of my family members, those born, those yet-to-be-born, and those who've already gone home. I am grateful that I have had such a positive breastfeeding experience. I am grateful for my marriage and my husband, without whom I don't know where I would be. I doubt I would be in as good a place as I am now. I am grateful and humbled to be the mother of the happiest boy in the world.